Memories
by r4d1c4lization
Summary: You didn't realize he could remember the events of a doomed timeline. But as he describes his dream, you can only think one thing - that you're grateful to be in this one instead.


Okay seriously. You had _just_ gotten to sleep, and you really don't appreciate being awakened like this, so it had better be important.

As your mind and senses join you in the waking world, you become more and more aware of the panicked movements nearby. You hear shouts of "Fuck!" and "Goddamn it!" as cans are knocked over — he'll pay dearly for that one; destroying Can Town is a crime that will not go unpunished — but one thing in particular stands out in your mind.

"Sh…shit! Terezi!"

Why does he sound so…terrified?

"Terezi! Wake up!"

You open your eyes, despite the fact that it doesn't do anything for you at all, and sit up, shaking your head. "Karkat? What's going on?"

He's at your side before you know it. You feel his hands hovering over you, like he was about to grab you and hold you tight but stopped himself. "This…isn't blood."

You shoot a look of confusion in his general direction. "Uh, no. No it's not. I don't know anyone with light blue blood, Karkles."

"Fuck you, in the dark it looked teal and I freaked out okay?!"

You want to snicker at how reliant everyone else was on their eyesight, but you instead find yourself staring at him incredulously. "Well it's not blood, and it's not even teal…Why are you still freaking out?"

"What? I'm not freaking out."

He is so bad at lying. "Come on Karkat. Come sit with me in the beautiful Can Lake and tell me what's the matter."

He huffs, but sits himself down next to you. He's grumbling something about getting "shitty chalk" on his clothes, and you snicker in response. Then he just sits there. You can't see him, obviously, but you're pretty sure he's not even looking at you. You get the feeling he's staring straight ahead, or maybe at his feet — regardless, he isn't talking, and it makes you a bit uneasy. But just as you open your mouth to demand that he speak, he does, as if he read your mind.

"It's nothing, okay? It was just a dream. Nothing to worry about." Then his voice comes quietly, muffled, and you assume he had buried his face between his knees — but you understood the comment of "It just all felt so fucking _real_," perfectly well.

"Tell me about it," you say.

You feel his gaze land on you, and then hear him sigh. You're waiting for him to dismiss the idea, a comment that he's not a wiggler, and maybe even a "fuck you" for good measure. But none of that ever happens. Instead he just complies and you're almost too surprised to really grasp his words.

"Jack found us," he murmured. "Vriska was gone and we were on the surface of the meteor, doing fuck knows what, when suddenly he was there, with all this blood already on that sword he has. Purple and jade and yellow, and…and I—I told you to get the fuck out of there, but you didn't say anything, and suddenly Jack was gone, and I turned around and…and—!"

Now he's silent again. Except for the occasional muffled sob that he's obviously trying to hide with his face buried in the fabric of his jeans all over again. You pretend not to notice — you'll give him that much of a courtesy. After a minute, you reach over and put a hand on his shoulder, before deciding that wasn't good enough and pulling him into a tight hug instead. You feel like you should say something, but can't think of anything _to_ say.

"If he really finds us," he says after a while, "I swear I won't be so useless. I'll protect everyone."

You sigh. "Karkat I know you're our leader, but you don't need to feel responsible for our lives. You don't have to 'protect' us."

You feel him shift, and now you're sure he's staring right at you. "Fine, if you say so. But I _will_ protect you, Terezi. I swear it. I refuse to stand by and watch you die again."

You blink, staring at him. "Wha? Karkat, I — Why me?"

You can smell the soft smile on his lips. "Don't act like you don't know," he finally murmurs. "I know you've moved on, and you have Dave now, because I fucked up whatever chance I had with you before. But even if I can't do anything else right I _will_make sure nothing happens to you. Not while I'm around."

You continue to stare for a moment before finally laughing. "You didn't fuck up anything," you tell him, "And even if you had, you just redeemed yourself."

He doesn't have to know that his dream was actually a memory from a doomed version of himself.

He doesn't have to know that it only exists because you were too weak in that timeline to do what you needed to do.

He doesn't have to know anything that could ruin this moment.

He _won't_ know anything that would ruin this moment. Because you're too busy enjoying it to tell him.


End file.
